IF ONLY WE KNEW
PHAP QUANG CULTURE COMPANY
ĐT/Fax: (08) 38462646 – 38479599
Mobile: 0986.861338 – 0984.982229
Email: congtyphapquang@gmail.com.
Website: www.thientonphatquang.com
“If we had known that love is blue
If we had known that every party would end”
………………..
“If he knew that I was getting married tomorrow,
Would he be sad?”….
The lyrics above are from an old but very popular love song and poem, expressing sorrow beginning with “If we had known” and “If he knew”. Today, we will discuss about this topic “If only we knew…” but in a different way. We are going to convey Buddhism philosophies with the hope of eliminating grief.
There is a Vietnamese saying: “A frog sits at the bottom of the well”, which means he could only see the sky via the top of the well, hence, he always thinks that the sky is just as small. The frog likes water, and it comes and goes from one well to another. The only way he could get out of a well was for someone to take the water, when he could take the opportunity to clutch onto the bucket of water. Sometimes, though, he would think that he was trapped, so he jumped back to the well again.
The frog in the well was like a prisoner. It did not die but had little food to eat. It did not have freedom. He viewed the sky, which was only as big as the top of the well. When someone intelligent put himself into the similar situation, he would realise that: “What he knew would only be so limited, like the fog viewed the sky from the bottom of the well. As time goes by, he would consider the sky and the universe to be as small as such a well. Then, he would think that he was the king of the world because the world is so small.”
Because of that narrow-mindedness, our ancestors had criticised: “Those, who lock themselves in their prejudices are their own prisoners. They do not know that there are countless things beyond their knowledge.”
Such people are subjective, prejudiced, and biased”. They think that what they see and know is everything. They would look down on everyone else. This could be called a sickness of being arrogant, subjective, narrow-minded, and short-sighted. They did not know that they have been confining themselves to their own prejudices. Nobody can stand these people’s behaviours. What they knew was so limited but they considered themselves talented. As a result, they showed arrogance and criticised people for not understanding and not praising them. They usually failed but still blindly thought that they were excellent. For that, they continued to experience failure and misery.
The analogy of the saying “A frog sits at the bottom of the well” indicates a weakness in our ethical standards.
Arrogance means one would consider oneself superior to others. Indeed, some are more intelligent than others, but wise ones would not be arrogant about that. This is the difference.
Usually, people would likely be arrogant when they have had achieved some successes, but they were not as wise, and they had low morale. This has caused failure for many others. For Buddhists, this behaviour would cause very bad karma. Though it is not as serious as murder or robbery, arrogance could destroy your blessings gradually. A Buddhist once said: “I don’t break any rules but only drink alcohol, which I think, is the least important.” When you already started having a bad habit, it is just a matter of time before you would start onto the other bad habits because arrogance is the cause, the motive urging you to do so.
Why are people arrogant?
It is because they have achieved some successes. It is human nature. For example, if a student could solve a challenging math problem, he had a delusion that he was very intelligent. However, it did not mean that he could solve other difficult math problems. Let us discuss another example. An employee had an idea to help his company overcome an internal issue: sell more products and increase revenue. Because he had been praised, he became too proud of his achievement, then became arrogant and had a delusion that he was very intelligent. There are many real life examples like that. Even with a Buddhist, when he discussed with non-Buddhists, and he could convince the others and make them respect Buddhism, the Buddhist became so proud about this achievement. When someone has achieved something in life, it is quite easy to feel proud and sometimes too proud leading to being arrogant.
People’s perceptions about themselves like the above examples indicate that they are unintelligent, and they made a serious mistake. Actually, anyone can make that mistake easily. However, we, Buddhists, who have learnt about
Buddha’s teachings; we should know the right and the wrong; though we may be successful or excel others, we must be modest and consider our achievements, even ourselves as nothing. If we could do that, we would live this life in harmony. And if we could do lots of good deeds, we should keep our mind pure and calm. We should love all beings, and we should respect everyone. We should not look down on others when we have had some successes in whatever we do. If we think highly of ourselves, we would easily make the same mistake of criticising others and looking down on them. We must also remind ourselves, and others so that we all are aware of the importance of having high morale, being modest in life, and as the result, everything is equally important.
Another bad point of arrogance is that it forms a habit of criticising other people. When we displayed such behaviour, we should know that we were dominated by arrogance and ego. The need to criticise someone comes from a psychological thinking: recognising others’ weak points means we are better than they are. It is a weird one, and it is like a formula stuck in our mind: “when we see other people’s weakness, we will feel good”. In fact, that feeling is wrong and very dangerous.
For example, seeing a girl with long smooth silky hair and good make-up on, we would think that she is attractive. However, someone else might say: “Her hairstyle does not look nice.” They made that criticism because they thought that they had more assessment skill than others. Let us discuss another example. After attending a seminar on a social issue, someone asked for our opinions, and we would not hesitate to do so. When saying so, we thought ourselves that we had assessed accurately the seminar, and could point out someone else’s weaknesses; that would make the listeners think that we were good. This caused a delusion that we were actually better than others. In reality, would our presentation be as good?
It might not be, but we would always try to find others’ weaknesses to attack and criticise.
In these scenarios, we did not have to spend any effort to improve ourselves at all, we could do that by just pointing out others’ weaknesses. This behaviour has caused a very bad habit in human behaviours, which has led to demoralisation. Could we like someone who had criticised us? It would be a challenge! Criticism separates humans. When we were about to say something bad about other, the relationship would be damaged. The arrogance in us would be stronger and obvious than ever.
Arrogance causes bad criticism and vice versa.
This sickness is very contagious. When we came to a place and only heard bad criticism, we would already know the nature of most of the people here. This sickness would also pass on from one generation to another. This is a very bad habit and it would cause people lose their blessings.
Each region has its own custom, which passes from one generation to another. There were places where there lived only farmers. However, these farmers were very knowledgeable about politics and political leaders. They always liked to discuss political related topics. This habit has passed onto other generations, and because of that, their children grew up and wanted to learn more and more to become leaders.
On the contrary, when we arrived at a place, where we only heard bad criticism about everything and everyone, we would realise that other generations in this place would probably have that bad habit as well. They were losing their blessings
All of us should know Newton’s saying: “What we know is only a drop of water, what we don’t know is an ocean.” He was extremely intelligent. Only wise and intelligent people can clearly think that they do not know all. Therefore, they would try harder to learn more and more to fill in their knowledge gaps. However, an arrogant person would not do so, as he would not know what he does not know.
Similarly, it is also different from one person to another when they pay homage to Buddha. Every Buddhist pays homage to Buddha, but those, who are knowledgeable about Buddhism, and appreciate the greatness of Buddha, they would bow to Buddha, with the utmost respect attitude, with all of their heart and soul. Those that could not appreciate Buddha’s greatness, they only pay homage to
Buddha because everyone else does so.
The wise ones clearly realise that they do not know all, while the ignorant ones are self-satisfied, opinionated, conservative, and imprisoning themselves in their limited knowledge and achievements, which, to them, are the truth.
Here is another example. About seventy years ago, people used to like to listen to traditional music, as modern music from western countries had not yet been available in Vietnam. Nowadays, this modern music is everywhere. Its rhythm is new and different, which attracts millions of people around the world. Those, who still played traditional music, had become less influential in the market. However, they did not accept new music style, and did not want to learn the new thing, and a better thing. They still believed traditional music is the best.
Recently, we noticed that many music composers had adapted western music style, mixing it with traditional music style. Some of the new songs were great. It was because the artist knew how to combine the best of the two musical styles and create the new and different tunes. Those artists were the one, who were not conservative and arrogant, who were willing to learn new thing and embrace it.
Similarly, in Buddhism, if a Master had been so successful, over forty or fifty years ago, but he would not change because he believed that he would be still successful with the same old preach. Think again! Forty years ago, people’s knowledge was limited, there was not also many Masters like today. However, forty years later, the number of great monks, great Masters had increased dramatically. Many have learnt new things and have a lot of knowledge. We must not be so narrow-minded, and we must not so focus on the past successes because life is changing every day; nothing is limited, and nothing lasts forever.
When we follow Buddhism, we must be open-minded. There are many jobs in the society, and nobody is good at everything. Similarly, there are many different aspects of Buddhism that no one would know everything about it. We must be modest. Our achievement is just the beginning, a stepping stone for our future. It is not the end. We should hope for more and more knowledgeable and greater people help promote Buddhism further.
We must understand that the Dharma is boundless, what we know is nothing. Buddha had said: “I have written so many, like leaves in the forest; but what I preached is just like a pile of leaves in my hand”. Therefore, as an average ordinary human being, we know nothing. Indeed, modest people are not arrogant and do not badly criticize anyone. They would provide constructive criticism with modesty, and would not do anything else bad to satisfy their ego. This is one of the most important ethical standards, which we must learn and practise to improve ourselves.
There are meditators who have attained the highest level of meditation. They are able to control their thoughts to empty and calm their mind. At that level, they feel peaceful and happy. Though with that achievement, they would never be too proud as that is nothing. The Dharma is boundless, what they attained is immaterial. We all have to try harder and harder. According to the Thevaradin doctrines, successful meditators would have eliminated the Five Fetters, which would help create a virtuous and relaxed mind, though they have not attained The First Dhyana.
For example, when someone asked about meditation and our answer was: “I have been able to control my mind when meditating.” That was a subjective statement. When we are still controlled by all the factors around us, still feel happy and sad according to our personal feeling, we then have not yet achieved anything in meditation. We have not eliminated the Five Fetters yet, therefore arrogance could still arise and control our behaviours.
Buddha had left the human world; no one would be able to remind us on how well or how bad we have progressed on the cultivation path. Therefore, if we kept thinking that we have progressed well, and became too proud of it, naturally we would be going backwards. Even indeed, we had achieved something, that was still nothing. We must pray to Buddha that we would always be modest and would always be nothing. When comprehending this principle, we should always be self-conscious, we must not be arrogant to criticise or bad mouth anyone else.
Nowadays, the Internet is so popular and information is available everywhere. Many people take advantage of the Internet and email to abuse others online. That is so sad! In the olden days, when someone badly criticised someone else, it would have been just between a couple of people. Nowadays, with the Internet, the world would know about these criticisms within minutes. This would cause very bad karma, but not everyone knows that.
In contrast, if we praised someone properly on the internet, many people around the world would know about it, that means we have created many blessings. Once we read an article online that badly criticised a monk. This article was written by another monk. The writer knew that before becoming a monk, he used to be a boatman. The language in the article was very disrespectful: “He was just a poor boatman who couldn’t earn enough to support his family”.
It was really sad. A boatman did nothing wrong. He did his job properly, transporting people from one place to another. That was a genuine job. Nothing was wrong with that. From a boatman, he became a monk, and then a famous Venerable.
We all have heard the fairy tale story of Cinderella. Cinderella was a poor girl who was ill-treated by her step-mother and step-sisters, but she still lived happily ever after with the handsome Prince. Though that is a fairy tale story, it has some similarities with the boatman story above. Though the boatman was poor, he came from a low income earning family. He left his job, followed Buddha, learnt and practised the Dharma, and then became the great Venerable. We should have admired him when hearing about that story. Why criticized his poor past? That was cruel. If anyone of us had agreed with the writer’s criticism about the boatman, or even felt happy when hearing the story, we should have known that our mind still had cruelty.
When hearing a person criticises another and we are happy, we are cruel. Only when hearing such sayings and we feel unhappy about it, we are ethical.
Criticism separates Buddhism and that separation accidentally provides opportunities to other anti-Buddhism powerful force. Please never think that Buddhism is safe and protected. Please never think that if we harm no one, no one will harm us. There is no such thing! There are many powerful forces trying to demote Buddhism. We always say: The world needs love. Yet, in reality, there are so many cruel acts that harm so many people. Please remember that a cruel person would always have great excuse for his act.
For example, an extreme Muslim would think that they killed people on behalf of God. “For God” is something so supreme while killing is extremely inhumane and evil, therefore, using that excuse is not acceptable at all. However, this is a true reality. Human would always use something great to cover or brand for their evil acts. Nowadays, there are many powerful political forces in the world, and its leaders always talk about peace, democracy and human rights but their acts and behaviours have been nothing but like saboteurs and terrorists.
This situation already exists in Buddhism. We must be cautious and careful. Many of them would use compassion to cover up their evil acts. We must ignore the excuses, the rationale of Why, and focus more on the actions. We should consider ourselves as nothing, and should try harder and harder to practise Buddhism. Never should we think that we represent Buddhism.
When someone claimed that they were representatives of Buddhism or Patriarchs, we knew there was something wrong. They were doing something evil, but using Buddhism to cover up their acts. Only those who are modest, who often do not say much, but do a lot, especially do not criticise anyone, would truly be great and kind-hearted ones.
Therefore, if we mistakenly criticised someone, we must be on our knees, and remorse in front of Buddha. Even when we only thought about a criticism, we should remorse immediately. Though we had not spoken out to criticise anyone, but we knew that our mind was not yet pure and calm. Criticism indicates arrogance and evil. Criticising someone is a sin, so we must be ashamed for this act, and we must remorse with Buddha. If we could practise not to criticise anyone, even only just a thought, gradually, we could be better, our mind could be calmer, and we would have less sin.
If only we knew that when criticising someone, we would act like them, we would not dare to criticise anyone anymore.
I used to hate football. It was only because I did not understand why everyone has to fight for one ball, then it made people miserable or happy… it was strange. When a famous football player came to our temple, and asked to take refuge to Buddha, I then had understood about football in a different way. This football player was very kind and very ethical. Looking at him playing with a ball skilfully in front of the yard, I understood why playing football was not a bad and strange thing.
We might have teased someone with speech impediment, but later on we probably had the same issues ourselves. There are many other examples about these bad criticisms. Therefore, we must be cautious of our words and actions; and never criticise anyone.
If only we knew that criticism reinforced arrogance and jealousy in our heart and soul, and that our soul would be miserable and destroyed afterwards, we would be so afraid and would not dare to criticise anyone anymore.
Every time we criticised someone, a bit of our soul would be destroyed. If we spent the whole life criticising everyone else, we would lose our soul, and would become unethical. However, if we were careful in our thoughts, our sayings and knew to comment or provide constructive feedback to help others, our heart and souls would improve gradually.
If only we knew that each praise would help soften and purify our heart and soul, and also offload our ego and increase our blessing, we would never hesitate to commend anyone.
Our compliments would help us think and improve so we could be like other great people. We must try to find good things about others and praise them for that.
Some may ask: “Don’t you see anything good about them?” Why couldn’t we see any good points to praise? That was because we were that frog, which sits at the bottom of the well, and could not see anything. Everyone has something good in them, even bad people. However, those good things are so few that we neglect to see them.
So what has blinded our eyes? Selfishness, narrow-mindedness, and cruelty have blinded our eyes. Therefore, although people have strengths, we still would not be able to see those clearly, but just the weaknesses. Unable to see others’ strengths and greatness indicates that evil is still in our soul. When we could not see good things in our family and friends, we knew that our soul was not pure, and vice versa. Good and kind-hearted people would be able to see others’ strengths, but they also able to realise their own weaknesses easily.
A truly genuine Buddhist have vowed to live in harmony with others, therefore, he/she would be able to see others’ strength to praise. When we praise someone, each praise would help soften and purify our heart and soul, and also offload our ego and increase our blessing; gradually their strengths would become ours. For example, we praised someone’s singing voice and gradually we would have a good voice. We praised someone’s good nature, then we would learn to be less critical and less cruel with others. We praised someone’s mercy, and we learn to be more merciful to others. We praised someone’s intelligence and wisdom, and we would learn and practise to improve our knowledge.
That is why we must pay homage to Buddha and often bow in front of Buddha, as it would help with our blessings.
Because we pay homage to Buddha, we would become more compassionate.
Because we pay homage to Buddha, we would become wiser.
Because we pay homage to Buddha, we would be enlightened.
We only need to be compassionate, be kind and love all beings from our heart and soul, like Buddha’s teachings, we would be successful in our cultivation path later on. I must stress that paying homage to Buddha is the most basic but the most important thing of all in Buddhism. We should remember that compliments are wonderful presents that we can give to everyone and do not cost us anything. We should never be modest in giving out compliments to others.
If only we knew that genuinely and sincerely wishing the best for others would create more blessing, we would want to do that more and more.
Wishing others for the better is only just the beginning. Sometimes, the wish is just a social obligation between two people, but its nature somehow forms the relationship between people. For example, on New Year day, we always wish each other a Happy New Year, or we often say: “Wish you good health and wealth”.
Though it is only the habit and the social obligation to do so, if we could be more sincere in our wishes, it might become true for others, and for ourselves as well.
This is another example. Seeing a good but poor person, we felt for him and wished: “Wish that you would have health, and would be wealthy”. We wished the best for them genuinely. When Buddha heard our wish and prayer and understood our true feeling, He would sympathise for us. We would not know if any of our wish would become true. But let’s be positive, be happy for each other. With karma, the law of case and effect, good things will happen to good people. Genuine and sincere wishes would help create more blessing for us. However, remember those wishes or prayers must be truthful and genuine.
If only we knew that it was not easy to control our thoughts, we would be so cautious and practise meditation more and more to control our mind.
Human being is controlled by their ego. For the academics, they often think that they are right, because that’s all they have in control. And their ego relies on that. Sometimes we criticise a person and sometimes praise another. It is quite natural. It is free. We often are controlled by our own assessment and often think that we are right. However, we must remember that nothing is absolutely right and nothing last forever. Buddha had said: “Never trust yourself until you become an
Arhat.”
We are not Arhats, so never trust your assessment completely. Often what we see is only about 10% right. However, we often use that 10% to represent everything else. We should not judge one country based on the minority. Similarly, we should not judge other religion based on our own assessment. We are only ordinary human begins. We are not intelligent enough to assess anything correctly. Only when we could become an Arhat, we would be able to be more accurate in our assessment.
Therefore, we must mediate to purify our mind, and our soul. Meditation practitioners are often more precise as they often try not to think about anything. As a result, naturally, their assessment is often accurate. That is wisdom. Wise people could see how the law of cause and effect controls everything else. They would be able to identify who good or bad people were without any trouble. Their mind are calm and pure, therefore, they could assess others very accurately, including their nature. They are no doubt intelligent people. We should not trust our assessment completely when our mind is still messy with thoughts. That means we are not wise enough. Only when we think of nothing, our soul is calm and pure, our assessment could be more accurate then. That is also wisdom.
If only we knew that those sublime principles that we had been taught might not be right; and the truth could just be quite obvious and ordinary.
This sounds very strange. There is a Buddhism teaching: “Bodhisattvas see everything nothingness: the earth, money, wife and children, houses, etc.”, while we see the opposite. That teaching is conceptual and sublime, we must be careful in understanding what it really means… Let us discuss another saying: “Human and Saint is the same.” It could not be possible. We have always thought that human was ordinary, while Saint was someone so noble and have attained enlightenment. How could they be the same? Again, we must be careful in interpreting this principle.
Another simple example is math. We all know the basic starts with 1+1= 2. Anything without the basic must be carefully assessed. Do not just accept any principle without understanding thoroughly about its context. The above principle must be understood within the right context. It based on ethical standard. It also based on kindness, compassion, and modesty. It was not about how we lived freely, without being considerate of everything else, without any respect to anyone else.
Once, a Buddhist did not greet me. She has been a Buddhist for quite a long time, therefore her behaviour surprised me. When asked, she explained: “Dear Master, I see that we are just the same, so I don’t see the need greet you.” I did not know what to say. Her response was completely wrong. Likewise, if someone asked: “Why don’t you bow to Buddha?” and if the answer was: “There is no need to do that”. That was a big mistake, a big delusion.
So what would be ethical?
For example, we were rich. One day, we drove pass a poor old woman, who was sitting in front of a house. We stopped and brought a basket of fruit to see the old woman. We asked thoughtfully: “Why are you sitting outside alone, under the bright sun?” She replied: “I come to visit my child but I don’t have the key to his house, so I’m waiting here until they come home from work.” – “Please have some fruits while you are waiting.” Then we continued our journey. Somebody asked: “Why do you have to be polite to the poor?” We replied: “The rich and the poor are the same.” Is this saying right or wrong? It is right, because it is ethical. When we could treat others well, regardless of their class or family circumstances, that behaviour is right. In contrast, if a poor person said the same thing about the rich and the poor, then it would be wrong. Because, in the later scenario, the poor considered themselves the same as the rich, which implied that they were wealthy, and that was not the truth.
It is even worse, if we compared ourselves with Buddha. That would be so wrong. Buddha is the most Honoured One. Buddha considered himself as all beings because he had achieved the highest level of enlightenment. Buddha’s blessing is boundless, we could not describe it in words. His compassion covers every single living being on earth. We, ordinary human beings, are full of greed, hatred, jealousy, and miseries, therefore, we are nothing compared to Buddha.
We must learn about Buddha’s teachings carefully, and we must understand those principles correctly and practise it in reality. Do not be confused between any sublime sayings and some sayings, which may be quite ordinary but actually originate from ethical standards. Some other Masters out there might have taught their disciples wrongly. The principles are not wrong, the way in which those principles were interpreted and understood were wrong, hence, the teaching was wrong. We must be cautious and careful in our learning journey.
If only we knew that others’ weaknesses actually were the lessons for us, we would be grateful and would not criticise.
When we saw someone, whose face was half covered with black skin, and we said “That woman looks like a ghost”, that was not wise and cruel. We should have felt for the woman, this was bad karma for her. In her past lives, she might have criticised other people’s appearances badly. We must know that others’ weaknesses are like lessons for us. We must be aware, as the result, and must not criticise their bad points. We must take the opportunity to learn and improve ourselves. Some people are selfish, and always competitive, but they actually struggle to win in anything. We must learn from that and avoid those people. Such people would be very miserable later in their life or in future incarnations.
“What we sow is what we reap”; that is the warning, we must be aware and careful in what we do and say. When we want to be competitive with others, just remember about the ugly woman, in the example above, and try to get rid of the greed and hatred in our head. Or, when we met someone, who often was hot-tempered with others, we must remind ourselves not to behave in the same way. Or, when we knew someone , who did not progress well at school, we must remind ourselves that perhaps, in their past lives, though they were intelligent, and progressed very well at school, but they did not share with others, therefore, in this life, they suffered the consequence. When we understand how karma works, we would be scared, afraid of having bad behaviours. We must take every opportunity in life to learn, to improve, to live in harmony and share with others. We must vow that: “If I know anything useful, I will share all with others.”
In general, humans have many weaknesses, and we must be grateful that we could understand the weaknesses and learn to avoid them. And it is because we have compassion for all beings, we would not criticise anyone. If there is love, there will be no criticism.
Our parents also have many weaknesses. No one is perfect. But we would never criticise them as we have the absolute compassion for them. True love and compassion will stop criticism. If criticising someone is so easy for any of us, we know that we do not have any compassion for anyone, or anything.
Therefore, I always remind all Buddhists:
- Firstly, love each other.
- Secondly, never criticise.
Criticism is the signal of jealousy and hatred, and they are not in any Buddhism principles. When we love other people, we will appreciate people’s weaknesses and miseries. Their weaknesses are lessons for us. We know that because we understand karma, the law of cause and effect, and we are grateful to know about the weaknesses, so we can avoid and could learn to be better.
If only we knew that people’s strengths were good examples for us, we would not dare to be jealous but would be so grateful.
For example, there was a devoted Buddhist, though he was so busy with work and famiily, but everyday he always visited the temple, paid homage to Buddha, prayed with other monks. Though he was poor, and could not contribute much financially, but he always helped with the temple chores. Cleaning could be seen as petty and dirty kind of task, and not everyone likes to do this task. Those people, who do not care about the task itself, but would do it anyway regardless, are kind and have high ethical standards. We must respect these people and learn from them.
If we were jealous of those compliments to good people and started criticising them, and showed off what we did for the temple, that would be very narrow-minded. When we are competitive and jealous of others’ compliments, it is unfortunate for us, because we would not be able to appreciate the greatness, even from a small deed.
When we heard others’ compliments, we often asked ourselves: we also contributed, but why there was no much of acknowledgement for us. That was jealousy and competitiveness. These feelings would prevent us from improving and being successful in our cultivation journey. Or, when someone with great knowledge of Buddha’s teachings, are willing to explain to others these teachings, these principles, and help them practise more and more, but we felt uncomfortable about it. We did not see him as a good example to learn from, but envied him, it was unfortunate for us, as we would never be able to comprehend Buddhism and would never be successful in our cultivation.
We must know that other people’s strengths are examples for us to learn from, and we must be grateful wholeheartedly.
We must be grateful to those hard-working cleaners, to people who understand Buddhism principles deeply, and to those who could mediate everyday. Meditation is hard work. We must sit still to train our mind to be calm and pure. When we had no one to help with mediation, but we tried harder and harder everyday to practise, that showed our desire to learn and improve, and that is a true
Buddha’s disciple. We must learn from these good people and their strengths. We must not criticise or bad mouth about them, or else we would get bad karma.
If only we knew that other people’s strengths are examples for us to embrace and learn for our whole life, we would be very grateful.
How many good people are there in the world? If we make efforts and have compassion for others, we will be able to realise that other people have many strengths, which we can learn from. The more we see other people’s strengths, the more grateful we would be for that. Therefore, we must be modest, we must consider ourselves as nothing because there are many better and greater people than us, whom we must respect and learn from.
Those, who could do this well, would be able attain the higher level of
Enlightenment. When we know someone’s great strengths, we would want to be good, to be the same. When we just see someone’s badness, we would be getting worse. Therefore, everyday, we must assess our mind of what we see in other people: good or bad. Nothing can measure our mind and our soul. However, it could be judged by hatred, compassion, and ethical standard.
If only we knew that “A year care, one minute ruin”, we would never be too proud of our achievement and never consider ourselves to be the best.
Though we could have been so careful, and though we could have lived in accordance with our ethical standards, we could still make mistake any time in life. For example, before becoming a monk, a man had lived a great life. But after becoming a monk, he was lovesick. He confided to his Master: “I know I am a good person, but I don’t understand why now I’m lovesick just right after I took refuge in Buddha. I know well that this is leading nowhere, but I still miss and love her.” The Master asked: “Have you ever criticised anyone?” The man answered: “Yes, I used to criticise my friends when they flirted with girls. I said: “You are not old enough to do that. I don’t love anyone.” Now, as a monk, I have fallen in love with someone.” This is the result of having bad karma “what goes around comes around”.
None of these mistakes is random. They are the result of either good or bad karma. These are ruled by the law of Cause and Effect. Only one mistake in the past could last every long and could come back to any time, either this life or future life. Therefore, as a true Buddhist, though we have lived a great live, though our ethical standard is very high, we must not be too proud and arrogant about our achievement, and we must not criticise other people. We must not think that because we have followed Buddhism for a long time, hence we are better than others. If we did say so, we would have to pay back some time either in this life, or in other life.
If only we knew that children’s manners could be easily impacted if they heard too many criticisms, we would not criticize other people in front of them.
When hearing criticisms, children would learn from those bad criticisms; they would have similar behaviours to those bad criticisms, therefore their manner would be badly impacted. We must not criticize other people in front of them, because it would spoil children faster. I once talked about teaching children: “We should try to praise good examples of adults and great people to nurture children’s soulW”.
Parents should read good books and articles about good people and good deeds, and then retell them to their children. For example, a poor old man kept repairing many roads; or a poor person raised orphans, etc… Loving our children, we should tell such great things to them. Apart from providing them with food, clothes, education, we should also give our children examples of real life heroes to nurture their mind and their souls, especially to help with their personalities and manners later on. Never criticise anyone in front of them. Criticisms will enter their mind and spoil our children rapidly. In the future, we would not understand why our children have been educated carefully but become such a different person. We would never know it is because we have raised them with so many criticisms about other people. That would be our failure.
If only we knew that forgiveness and education would be harder but would leave fewer bad consequences than hatred.
If we abandoned someone, who made a mistake, or punished the person severely, the consequences could be worse that we forgave or we were patient to re-educate the person. It would be so much easier to put a criminal in prison. However, re-educating and re-training these criminals would be a much better strategy than putting them in prison because prison is the source of many crimes. Bad environment would bring bad influences on these criminals.
A good government would have to be very patient with protesters. A good government would not just sentence them to death, or would have a conspiracy to get rid of them. A good government would act in accordance with international law. Though it would be harder, but it would not have bad consequences in the future.
It is similar in Buddhism. Educating a person is really hard. Sometimes we have to be strict; sometimes we have to be patient and tolerant. The goal is for the person to realise his or her own mistakes and to reform without hatred. We must not abandon them.
Abandoning these sinful people usually causes bad consequences for their family and the society. Some parents did abandon their children, who were so spoilt, while they still had opportunities to educate them. However, some parents were so patient to spend five, ten and even twenty years educating their spoilt children, and finally their children were awaken and lived a good life.
To achieve such results, we have to work harder and harder, and it would help us pay off the debt from the past incarnations. Why would we have a disobedient and spoilt child in our family? It is because in our past lives, we had harmed other people with our bad behaviours. In this life, he/she had come back as our child for us to pay off the past life debt. If we abandoned the child, eventually he/she would have come back to haunt us because it would not yet be over. Therefore, educating someone patiently and having compassion for someone could be a very hard thing to do, but it would have good return. Compassion and love could change many things, we must always apply it in real life.
If only we knew that forgiveness and weakness are completely different, though on the surface it sounded the same, we would have to be very careful.
For example, a robber was captured as he robbed someone for money. He was a spoilt child. If the parents were weak, they would offer a bribe to some officials to get him out of any punishment. That is weakness, not love, not forgiveness. If they indeed loved their son, they would attempt to some other ways to educate their son. The son may still be in prison, but they would need to find ways to educate him and make him realise his own faults so that he would reform. If they bribed someone for their son to get out of prison, he would behave the same repeatedly, may be even worse than the first few times.
In the 13th century, the Islamic troops invaded India. At that time, Buddhism in India was flourishing. In Nalanda, there was a very well-known Buddhism University with over 10,000 excellent monks. It was not easy to gather 10,000 monks back then. To be accepted at this University, they had to be very outstanding. But it took only 150 soldiers to kill all the monks. The university was flooded with blood.
Why were there only 150 soldiers but they able to kill 10,000 monks? Why did the monks do nothing; why didn’t they defend themselves, did not put up a fight but let themselves be killed? Because they thought they were right. They were confused between weakness and forgiveness. These two things are completely different. Their choice to die was not forgiveness but weakness. That way of death was not good, because after their death, Buddhism would be in danger, as there were no talent left. We would die for the good to live; we would die for the country; we would die for the country independence and wealth; we would die for Buddhism to stand firm and be flourishing; we would die to nurture others’ morals. These are meaningful deaths and sacrifices. We are Buddhists; we must understand the differences between forgiveness and weakness.
If only we knew that after we had achieved the ability to calm our mind, to be modest and to have compassion, we also must prepare to educate others, and to prevent evils.
We must be kind and compassionate, but must not be lazy or coward. Compassion and kindness are so different from laziness and cowardice. Many people said: “I am practising Buddhism principles, so I actually do not need to do anything else.” or “I am a Buddhist now, I would be OK with whatever others to do me.” We often are mistaken that being kind and being compassionate means doing nothing and not standing up for others and ourselves. Be very cautious! Because it could be cowardice and laziness. It is a very common mistake.
Some Buddhists, at first, were still angry and arrogant. However, over time, if we often came to the temple listening to sermons about modesty, kindness, compassion, forgiveness, we could be improved. When we have attained such qualities, we must continue practising to equip ourselves with bravery, diligence, and the spirit to confront challenges. We must dedicate effort to time to help others, to educate others and to prevent evils.
If we met someone, who did not believe in karma, we must be patient to convince him/her. We must live a good life to set a good example and must be patient to educate him about karma, and how the cause and effect law works. Or, if we knew someone plotted to set explosive to destroy our temple, we must inform the police, and helped to find the bad people. We must not leave the pagoda, because we were worried that our life would be in danger. That would be cowardice.
We must know that if we did not have enough compassion but just reacted to anything, we would be so wrong. If we were compassionate, but still were weak and behaved cowardly, that would be even worse.
When we did not take action to prevent the good from the bad, though we had the compassion for all beings, we were still wrong. When we did not have compassion for anyone, but behaved badly, that would be even worse. Hence, the challenges for all Buddhists are: we must be compassionate, but at the same time, we must also be decisive and brave.
When we first learnt about Buddhism, we were often taught of being compassionate and being kind to all beings. That is correct, but not enough. Compassion must come with determination and courage. The problem is that when our compassion is not enough but we hurriedly believe that we are determined and brave, therefore we often make mistakes and can easily get into quarrel and displease others. We must have enough compassion first and foremost.
Some Buddhists have the bad habit of badmouthing other Buddhists, but they did not do anything to harm other religions. This is one of the reasons why Buddhism is at risk of being attacked by other religions. We must know that many other religions have plotted conspiracies to destroy Buddhism, using Buddhism disciples. They pretended to follow Buddhism, become its disciple, but just to criticise, speak ill of others and many other bad behaviours with the purpose of causing disunity and division amongst Buddhists. They organised demonstration to show off their power. They are not Buddhists; they are outsiders.
The following is a true event. In the old days, Buddhism was the national religion in Thailand. The government wanted to show their clemency by allowing other religions to develop. They did not know that 30 years later, those religions had driven Buddhism away from 5 provinces in Thailand. They had planted spies in the authority to hold essential positions, overthrown the authority, and put the Royal Family under control, etc. Vietnam would also be threatened if Buddhism in Thailand, Laos and Cambodia do not remain a national religion. We will not be able to come here for Dharma preach. The conception of religion tolerance will drive people away from pagodas and hence, Buddhism will be eventually weakening, then diminish.
If only we knew that it was not right if we just accepted any religion. We must choose the right religion.
Being parents, we must not allow our children to choose their own religion. We must not be irresponsible in this matter; we must choose the best religion for our children. Similarly, a leader of a country must not be so forgiving or tolerant, that allows any religions to develop and grow without any governance. The leader must find the right religion for its countries, its citizens. In many cases, tolerance and forgiving is actually being weak and loose, not being in control. To find the truth, it requires a lot of hard work, even sacrifice.
If only we knew that gold and gem are precious and need to be protected. Buddhism is millions times more precious, therefore, we must protect Buddhism until the end.
Would we show off to everyone that we had a big diamond? Absolutely not! We would lock it carefully. However, even with such carefulness, but with greed, others could still find a way to steal it. We must protect anything that is valuable.
Buddhism is much more precious than anything, but our awareness to protect Buddhism is still so weak. Though we practise, but we have not cared enough about protecting Buddhism. This is a weakness of Buddhism for thousands of years. That was why 150 soldiers were able to kill all 10,000 monks in the story mentioned above. We are lack of understanding the importance of protecting Buddhism. Protecting good things, protecting the truth, and protecting justice are our duties and obligations.
Since we took refuge in the Buddha and learnt the Dharma, we have learnt that Buddhism is the Truth, which can save millions of people from misery. We must think about how to protect and preserve Buddhism forever, so that no one can destroy Buddhism, so that there is no division in Buddhism, so that no one will bomb pagodas and kill monks”. All of us must start thinking about this.
For example, a father advised his son: “This is the heirloom passed on from many generations in our family. Our ancestors fought the enemies to protect our country. After the victory, the King had awarded our ancestor a precious wine glass and this gem bracelet. Our brothers kept the glass, but we were allowed to keep this bracelet. You must take care of this bracelet, not only because of its value, but also it represents our family’s glory and reputation”.
We now know that Buddhism could save this world; it could make this world become more peaceful and happy; and it could make people love each other, lead people to enlightenment and deliverance from rebirths; then we must try our best to protect Buddhism.
From now on, we must assess ourselves carefully. Though we have been paying homage to Buddha, respecting all monks, practising the Dharma, but if we have not yet had the awareness and the willingness to protect Buddhism, we are still lack of a very important part of this religion. We must ask ourselves what we must do to protect Buddhism, to unite all Buddhists, to eliminate criticism, so that no one can penetrate and destroy Buddhism. What must we do to prevent the day when other people attack Buddhism with bombs and guns?
Buddhism is becoming weaker; therefore, it often does not dare to fight back. Hence, we must be strong enough to protect ourselves. Where the government is strong, we must ask the government to protect Buddhism. Where the government is not strong, Buddhism must learn to protect itself with any measures and any means. Everyone must stand up for ourselves, for our religion. We, true Buddhists, must not be coward and weak. Those, who know martial art, must teach others to defend themselves and protect others.
If only we knew that subjectiveness is the biggest weakness, and we mistakenly thought that we were safe forever, then we were actually preparing for our own failure in the future.
We often mistakenly believe that Buddhism is strong, because there are a huge number of Buddhists. In fact, Buddhism is slowly becoming weaker. If we subjectively think so, we actually started contributing towards destroying Buddhism. Subjectiveness always comes with prejudice and wrong judgement. If there were many Buddhists have the same subjective thought, the religion could decline very quickly.
It is the same with cultivation. It would be wrong to think that: if we have practised regularly and improved ourselves slowly, blessings would eventually come. Regardless of how hard we have tried to practise the Dharma, we must not think that we have done well in cultivation. It is because with that thinking in mind, we often would be subjective in our thinking, and assessment, which would lead to wrong judgement and failure. Similarly, no one is indispensable in any corporate organisation; no position would last forever.
Never be subjective and never be prejudice about anything because it just ruins our own blessings. Those, who are modest and always want to learn more and improve, will continue progressing higher and be better. Their willingness to try harder and practise harder would help them to be successful in life. Those, who think that they are already at the top, would eventually go downhill. Therefore, the wise always sees themselves at the foot of the hill, but the fool always sees themselves at the top and they will start to roll down naturally.
For all of the above examples and scenarios, we must now realise that we must not be subjective and prejudiced about anything. The truth is something boundless, and is never enough as the more we search for it and learn about it, the more truth we would find. Likewise, we must try harder, try many ways to promote and protect Buddhism. The more we do to protect Buddhism, the better…
It would never be enough. It is like we are building layers and layers of protection for this precious and holy religion.
Thus, we must understand the Dharma is boundless and would never be enough. If anyone or any Masters think that they have understood everything in the Dharma, we know that in the end they will fail due to this weakness. Please remember today sermon!
It is impossible to list everything here, so to finish off with the following conclusion:
If only we knew that Saints never rested but were never busy, we would pay homage to them and learn from them.
Why is that so? It is because they love all beings and will do anything for the benefits of all beings. When they teach the Dharma, or do any good deed…
those are for others, not for themselves. They would never waste a small moment. They would always do something useful for the world and beings. It may be a small happiness for one person or for many people, all for the sake of others. And they would never associate themselves with all the things they have done. Therefore, they would never see themselves busy. Due to great effort ain meditation, their mind is so calm have full of compassion for others.
Now that we understand Bodhisattvas’ compassionate mind, we would vow to lead the same life. We are not Bodhisattvas, but we could imitate them slowly, one step at a time. We vow to devote our whole life for others, for Buddhism, for all beings. We vow to never live for ourselves, never waste a minute, and never enjoy ourselves. We vow to be very diligent, dedicated and to work harder for others.
Namo Sakya Muni Buddha!
